their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
