what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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