I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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