I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize