thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
either way he was missing a nipple.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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