even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
