Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
