There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
that's an acceptable place to lick
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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