I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
