it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
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