Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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