i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
