she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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