Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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