i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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