That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I need to sanitize my soul.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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