Duck Duck Cougar?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Randomize
