IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
