I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Randomize
