She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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