She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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