is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
