I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
