the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Your mouth is God's brothel.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
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