I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize