So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
