your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Randomize
