grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
