isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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