i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
dude i'm inner monologue high
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
