its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
