If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize