Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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