Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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