Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize