2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
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