Nicole vs. Life
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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