just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
