I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
