Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
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