Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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