Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
