why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
