Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
