i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Someone shattered a urinal.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize