she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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