I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
