You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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