Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
