it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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